Well, Valentine’s Day is around the corner once again. A lot has changed since I published last year’s prequel to this post, “When Your Valentine is a Farmer”. My farmer, a Holstein guy from birth, gave me a Jersey heifer for my birthday … and asked me to be his wife two days later. Of course I said yes; how could I not?
In that year, I learned a lot more about what it means to be a farm wife – and a farmer – than I could have imagined. Here are a few more tips I picked up in those 365 days.
- Be patient. This starts off similarly to what I wrote last year, but I’m referring to a different kind of patience this time around. Last year I talked about the need to be flexible with aspects of farm life, but since then I have learned the importance of needing to be patient with myself. I didn’t grow up on a farm. Therefore, my learning curve coming into this crazy, beautiful life has been very steep. There are many times where I’ve screwed up and thrown my hands in the air, self-lamenting that I can’t do anything right. However, I’m still learning. We all are. And that takes me to my second tip.
- You are not Superwoman or Superman. Don’t even bother trying to be perfect, for it is when we fail or are challenged that we learn and grow. I am by no means the perfect dairywoman; I’ll confess that I’m not always in the barn for morning chores and I do not like cheese. Just breathe, smile, and do your very best. As another farmer friend told me, sanity has a cost that isn’t seen on a balance sheet.
- Above all else, love. One thing that hasn’t changed with Sam and I is the love we have together, other than that it continues to grow and deepen. A couple of nights ago, Sam and I had an interesting discussion about the personification of animals, and what he said made me speechless. “Brit, I enjoy working with my cows and I love being a dairy farmer. But humans and animals are not on the same level. For example, you. You are the one and the only one that matters in my life, and I will never place the cows above you. Ever.” After months of reading a lot of farm wife blogs warning people like me that the cows come first, I was floored. But Sam is right; there are more important things in life than chores. Love your farmer and yourself as well.
Our wedding is on the farm in Dallas (Wisconsin, not Texas) on May 29. Yes, we know it’s a Sunday, but Sam and I are one of those cool and unconventional couples and everyone has the next day off anyway. Do I know what I’m getting myself into? Kind of…I think. It doesn’t feel quite real yet. I’m a bit nervous but definitely looking forward to spending the rest of my life with Sam. Farmer or not, I’m so blessed to have him as my lifetime valentine.